Daring to be dorky

[theatokos]

I am back to the quiet though tedious rhythms of my working week. After a crazy over-stimulated weekend spent at Pantheacon (largest pagan conference in the world I think?) I need all the quiet and stillness I can get. I was pleasantly surprised at how much fun I had - it helps to have friends there! I was not surprised at the amount of crap presented, but I am getting better at detecting such things. I mostly had good experiences, including one well deserved nap (it was a guided meditation, I wasn't being discernibly rude). Margot Adler's discussion of the sociological changes in paganism over the last 30+ years was just fantastic. There was also a Feri ritual on Saturday night that was really silly and yet felt every bit like any good church experience I've ever had. (That's praise, for those who might be confused!) It was a large spiral dance with drums and a little sung phrase that repeated. I quickly got over my self-consciousness and just enjoyed myself - everybody else was in a similar state. It was this wonderful moment where I caught myself spinning and singing with punks and fairies/feris/radical faeries and druids and old ladies and all sorts. Afterward I felt high. I've been experiencing that a lot lately. Partly due to my singing practice - the amount of oxygen taken in can sometimes cause that feeling, as can singing into the stratosphere where my head starts ringing and I feel like I'm going to lift off into space, such an exhilarating feeling! But the spiral dance thing was strangely invigorating and meditative at the same time. It's completely dorky but I liked it a lot. I even found myself wishing I had had sparkles and some kind of festive costume. My god what's happening to me?!

Thinking of future Pantheacons, I plan to present next year. Something on Mary, of course. I think it'll be a good goal for me.