theatokos: (Default)
theatokos ([personal profile] theatokos) wrote2009-12-14 10:50 pm
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I've said every day is like a vacation here. Every day is so lazy and free and easy. I don't really have to do anything at any particular time. I get to be with Adam and Bennett as much as I want. It's gorgeous, quiet and safe here. It's downright bucolic. Village time has taken over.

But I'm slipping. I can't seem to answer an email or phone call in a timely fashion. It takes me weeks to file paperwork. I've been working on ONE 20 page paper this entire term. I cannot bring myself to care about the news. I was given a recent copy of the Economist, I flipped through it, and set it aside. I just want to do..... nothing. I want to be slow.

This doesn't feel depressive to me. It feel like an honest to god break. A mental and motivational vacation. I think I'm still recovering from the move - deciding, willing, facilitating, making it happen. And becoming a mother. And being... well, being me. DOING things. All the damn time. Maybe I need a season to be late, lazy, unresponsive, unmotivated, and not have it be because of a mental health problem.

But things do have to get done. In a display of accountability, I present my list of things to take care of tomorrow:
*Attend the holiday party at the Family Centre
*go to the Academic Registry and the Council Office (paper work which is about 8 weeks overdue!)
*read through my paper
*maybe make a hair appointment
*talk to E about babysitting
*talk with Adam about our Plan to De-Mold the House
*maybe think about Christmas cards and stuff
*make curried lentils with spinach and brown rice for dinner

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