theatokos: (Default)
theatokos ([personal profile] theatokos) wrote2010-02-15 02:15 pm

Rape is never the victims fault

Women say some rape victims should take the blame

WHAT? I don't even need to read this entire article to know that women have internalized the hateful misogony of the patriarchy and suffer from self-loathing ideology. Why do women hate each other like this? Rape is NEVER the victim's fault. Even if you're comatose from drinking or you're walking naked down the street. Women make loads of stupid decisions all the time. And there are other consequences of the above actions: alcohol poisoning and the flu, perhaps. But rape? It is not a man's duty to 'punish' me for my stupid actions. Women and men may judge women who make stupid choices and think 'they got what they deserved', but that's not what it is about is it? No. It's about men thinking women are sex objects, that any woman who is passive enough is theirs for taking, that women are sub-human and do not have the dignity that men have. In cases of rape the blame is ALWAYS on the assailant. It is the perpetrator who cannot keep his hands (and other bits) to himself. It is HIS lack of self-control and his lack of honor for other living creatures.

I was date raped when I was 20. I take responsibility for my stupidness. I acknowledge that I was weak and had poor boundaries. I did not report it because it was so.... murky. I was up for fooling around. I was not up for sex. I said no. He didn't listen. We were in my bed. Am I to blame? If you say yes, defriend me right now.

[identity profile] readthisandweep.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 06:48 pm (UTC)(link)
I think you are missing the point. Rape overall is of course a humanitarian issue. But in the context of this debate, here on [livejournal.com profile] ewigweibliche's LJ it is about MEN raping WOMEN & therefore it is A WOMEN'S ISSUE. Sorry if it sounds like I'm shouting at you, but it's important not to confuse the 'issue' by diluting it.

We're all on the same side ~ if we call ourselves feminists we have to put women & children first. In this particular instance, I don't care about the men. I want to discuss what we began ~ debate the serious crime of male on female rape.

[identity profile] erinya.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I guess my post-gender feminism really has no place in this discussion. Bowing out.

[identity profile] ewigweibliche.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 07:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh don't bow out!

I want to be post-gender! In theory I am, but I don't see the reality of it yet. Maybe in SF. But the rest of the world? Still figuring out that women aren't property or meat sacks.

[identity profile] erinya.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 08:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Sure, and I think post-gender isn't quite the right term for what I am. I don't think that gender shouldn't matter or that it's not an important part of our identities. And I don't by any means think it DOESN'T matter now. I know that sexism is very real. I just am less and less interested in feminism as a women-only space. I think that feminism as it is now often enforces gender binaries and polices gender identity and I think that is totally counterproductive.

[identity profile] ewigweibliche.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 08:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes in theory, but I disagree in real lived life. I don't think feminism is or ought to be a women's only space, but I think dragging in 'what about the men' to a little post like mine is complicating the point with theory.

[identity profile] erinya.livejournal.com 2010-02-15 08:53 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry. I'll be quiet then.

[identity profile] readthisandweep.livejournal.com 2010-02-16 09:18 am (UTC)(link)

Absolutely. And this is the important ISSUE here. A 'little' post highlighted a current issue that got several of us fired up. A perfect opportunity to debate it. And we end up diluting that topic instead of putting our valuable, feminist energy into exploring what the debate was intended to be about.

It happens all the time & is IMV counterproductive.