Birth

[theatokos]

I'm reading an amazing book on pregnancy and childbirth right now: Ina May Gaskin's Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. It's inspiring, wacky, and informative. The point of view is strongly pro-natural birth, but many of the pain management and labor easing practices could be used in the hospital too.

What's blowing my mind is that she talks a lot about the sexuality of birth. I know. Sounds crazy, right? Except, Gaskin makes it sounds totally normal and sane and even, dare I say, appealing! She encourages women to get as comfortable and secure as possible. Makes sense. She also encourages lots of hugging, kissing and sensual touch to relax women and their vaginas. I guess that also makes sense, seeing as how vaginas loosen and expand when sexually stimulated and this makes it easier for large items to slip in - and out! Breast stimulation also encourages the release of oxytocin which helps with pain management and facilitates the actual birth process. This is a natural way to get this hormone, as opposed to oxytocin administered externally in hospitals that want to speed along birth.

All of this is fascinating, but reassuring too. While it's gonna be real weird to stimulate my nipples in front of my mum, I also feel really empowered by the knowledge that I (and Adam) can be more "in control" of my own birth process. At least, I can be more than some sort of passive vessel, where others poke and prod me along. It's really a strange change of attitude, but I'm sort of looking forward to birthing my son. I look forward to this experience. Before I was up for the daunting task, but viewed it as that: a marathon to be run or a mountain to be scaled, something that would be hard but I'd be proud to say I did it. Now, I'm more looking forward to the journey itself.

And getting that from a simple book is priceless.

Comments

[thekitchenvixen.livejournal.com]

I have the Spiritual Guide to Midwifery and while I love her inclusion of mental/spiritual/sexual barriers to birth and how to open yourself up to have the most effective labor... I do feel she is a little too into interventions, from the birth stories in that book.
I'd love to read the Guide to Childbirth, I heard its a bit better in that respect.

Oh and by the way, I fully intend to take advantage of being at home, possibly alone, during early labor. I want Niya to be here for the end stages and to see the baby be born (if she wants to of course), but in the beginning, nothing like some good old SEX to keep you going.
Sex + Labor = A good combination.


And the journey? Don't just take terms used by Ina May such as "trippy" or "psychadelic" to be merely a product of her time period. The journey through "laborland" is VERY TRIPPY AND PSYCHADELIC. :) I think you have the perfect attitude about this by the way.

[snowcalla.livejournal.com]

I'm trying to think of what I would have done to my husband if he had even thought of touching me during labor....it wouldn't have been pretty. ;)

EAT: because I didn't want anyone to even touch my hand or my hair. Part was focus, it was a distraction...

[erinya.livejournal.com]

That sounds very cool. You know, I really appreciate reading about your journey into motherhood and how openly you have embraced the whole process. I'm glad you are willing to share that experience with us. :-)

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

I'm not quite sure what you mean by interventions. She doesn't seem pro-intervention at all! But the heavy 1970s language (mostly from her husbands weird interjections) make the book very outdated. I definitely think her Guide To is more informative and useful.

We'll see about actual intercourse.... I can't say it's felt very good for a couple of months. The little pea seems to lying very low and everything feels really cramped down there.

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

You know, I wonder how I'm going to be in labor. I may very well a hands-off kind of gal. We'll see! But at least I have a lot of tools in my kit to use, should I need them. That's the reassuring part.

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I think I'm opening more and more to the process. It's been a hard month. I'm actually starting to get excited about having a boy. This experience though has made me pretty convinced that when we have #2 (and there will be another!) I won't find out the sex.

[snowcalla.livejournal.com]

oh certainly. Every person is different and every labor is different.

Also...I was in a hospital where almost no one spoke english and my limited spanish fled in the face of fear and pain. People just did things to me with no explaination ... so at less than 30 minutes into the deal I wanted everyone to leave me the hell alone.

Very different from what you are up to.

[msmidge.livejournal.com]

I read that book too. I hope your birth experience is what you want it to be. Mine was pretty mixed. (I don't remember if I posted a birth story or not, but it would be in the end of September or early October 2006 if I did.)

[thekitchenvixen.livejournal.com]

She very often prematurely breaks the waters, and almost always gives enemas. I was also surprised at the amount of episiotomies.
I understand thats NOTHING compared to what goes on with normal medical births, but on the other hand it is pretty unnecessary.
Furthermore, some of her attitudes are very "midwife saves the day"
I guess it just depends on how you look at it

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

Hmm..... "very often" isn't how I'd describe it! Plus, her episiotomy rate (if you read her statistics in the back of Spiritual Midwifery) is really really low. However, her Guide To is written 25 yrs later and her rate has gotten even lower. In fact, she even mentions not to do an enema (I think). But, she wrote Spiritual Midwifery in her early days, relatively, and in a time where there was next to no info on the subject.

I do agree that she has a very Super Midwife to the Rescue! attitude. However, reading her second book has seriously empowered and inspired me, so clearly what she's saying is powerful. I mean, I have always been a pretty pro-birth kind of person, trust in your body, etc, but over the last few months I've been surprised at the amount of fear that has been implanted in my brain around this subject. And I've adamantly refused to listen to any scare stories or watch those "birth stories" bullshit shows in TLC! I think our modern birth culture could use a little Super Midwifery!

[thekitchenvixen.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah I guess thats just why I'm having some bad feelings with Spiritual Midwifery. This is all the stories of her from on the road and the early days on the farm.
Yeah, I guess it just depends on how you look at it. I view anyone "to the rescue" as a negative sort of thing, but that's also because of my own experiences with pregnancy/birth.

[(Anonymous)]

I just think you are so brave and amazing! This is about as close as I'm going to get to the process so I like the details. :-)

The book sounds awesome. I'm glad you're feeling confident and positive about going into this.

Your Mum is completely unflappable, I'm sure she'll be great and I bet in the moment you'll be completely fine with it.

Love, who else but your Twig? :-)

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

So.... you've finally finally come back around to not giving birth? I totally support that, but you know that!

We'll see what happens. It could turn out that once in labor I want everyone to leave me alone.

[(Anonymous)]

yep.

I think now that you and Kristin are pregnant/giving birth...I think I can settle and be peaceful that I'm not going to suddenly wake up one day and want to get pregnant! I think if it was going to happen it would definitely happen now, especially after visiting the SUPER COOL birthing center.

If it ever does happen accidentally it's fully birthing center all the way, baby!! Either that or C section, nothing in between. :-)

[mz-seshet.livejournal.com]

I cannot emphasize the being comfortable with your self, your body, your sexuality enough.
In fact, as I read your post and started thinking about this reply, this quarter's work popped into mind. Plumbing the depths and getting really cozy with ALL your parts can make such a difference for this upcoming journey of yours.

And, yeah, I wouldn't call it psychedelic visions, but the memories I have are trippy and real Fire in the Earth. I had imagery of volcanoes and earthquakes and felt like I was Mother Earth going through one of these natural, but historic events.

And I don't know about during labor -ow!- but intercourse can get the labor started. Some say semen can cause the cervix to soften and prepare to open.