A Fresh Start

Poor B. Mon and Tues he was running a fever but seemed otherwise fine. After the fever broke on Tues evening he's been a pill. The cold is in full force and he's miserable in attitude. The littlest thing sets him off. I've never seen so many tantrums and out of the blue tears. It's rough. And I'm wrecked.

But for a little while this afternoon we sat out in the back garden nursing and reading and just happy in the grass. I listened to the birds chirping, watched a huge buzzard swirling in the sky, looked at the green green hills. I got hit with the thought that this land desperately wants to tell its stories and secrets. In fact, this land will offer it all up to the first ear that will sit and listen. This is not a shy nor even picky land. Whereas when I was in Australia I really felt like the land would not easily reveal itself at all. Australia is beautiful, but it is cautious. I know none of that makes sense. But there it is.

Last thing before I go zone out in front of some telly. Adam just spent an hour getting a cute little brown mouse out of his office. I'm pretty sure the cats brought it in. We didn't want to kill it and finally Adam was able to scoop it up (in gloved hands) and take it outside.

This post/question session is for those who know London at all.

In three weeks I'm back to Roehampton. This time I'll have Friday evening to myself, which I plan to fill with a movie and dinner (either in Putney or in Richmond), Saturday is an all day conference and then I think I'm going out to dinner with my advisers and fellow scholars. Sunday is an entire day free. I will be back in the area two weeks later and then three weeks after that. What do I do with myself on my Sundays?? There are SO MANY choices! I don't know where to begin. The Tates, the British Museum, the National Gallery, the British National Library, the different Castles, the different gardens and parks, various bookshops. And on and on. What's reasonable to fit into a single day? I have no idea where to start. Do I go into the city? Or do I stay near the Roehampton area and explore Richmond, Mortlake (John Dee's house!), Richmond Park? I'm overwhelmed by choice. I plan on getting an oyster card to facilitate public transport.

Lastly, does anyone know if you can walk the Thames? Like, is there a path that I could just meander on, or is it broken up by sections that don't allow pedestrians? I fell in love with the Thames on the last trip and want to explore it more. I even picked up Peter Ackroyd's book, Thames: Sacred River (same guy who wrote London: the biography) today at the library.

Thanks for any and all suggestions!

*Keypikian? Keypikite? Keypiker? I think I like the first choice.

Weather: It's wet and grey here. But the birds are chirping happily. It's neither cold nor warm.

Dinner tonight: roast chicken, carrots, and potatoes with garlicky salad

Currently reading: a collection of essays called Archaeologies of Consciousness: Essays in Experimental Prehistory by a guy known only as Gyrus. It's neat stuff.

It's a full moon tonight. I don't think we'll be able to see it.

In the spirit of gratitude.

*Spring. It is here. There is red growth on the tree branches, the faintest of buds on some. The snow drops have been bloomed for weeks. The daffodils have had their green out but yesterday I saw the yellow bits all enclosed waiting to bloom. I saw some purple crocuses over the weekend too. Birds are building nests and chirping like mad. The sun is warm. Today I hung my laundry out on the line for the first time since November! Ah, sun, miracle elixir, you take away the stains of the world.

*My homemade chicken noodle soup. Lately, I've been nailing the broth. Bennett drinks it down.

*Mutliculturalism. Adam, B and I went to a birthday party yesterday. It was one of the the most diverse parties I've ever been to. It was the first birthday of a little boy that goes to one of B's playgroups. The little boy was asleep through most of it. He is Nigerian. His father is a student here. Aunts and uncles from London came. There was a Polish couple. Locals, though mainly of English extraction. Two Muslim families from Libya were there too - the hosts are also Muslim. And one little boy who is half Bengali. Languages heard: English, Spanish (thanks to Adam), Polish, Yoruba, Arabic. Amazing.

*Friends. We have friends here! Not really close friends, yet, but friends nonetheless. It's wonderful. It's like we live here.

*Best of all, Bennett goes to sleep at 8pm. ( Cut for those who couldn't care less )

ETA: How could I forget?! Adam got a great gig today. So we will have money for bills one month in advance. This is a great step toward getting back on our feet!

(Btw, what does keypike reference?)

This morning the fog was so thick I could barely see across the field in front of my house. It didn’t clear until close to noon. The spring day is delicious. I appreciate the lift in my mood and bounce in my step that spring brings. Eventually summer will set in and I really won’t want to spend anymore time than I have to in my office. For now, though, it is working to my benefit.

I’ve started meeting some of the other postgrad students here for a coffee a few mornings a week. They are mostly anthropology and archeology students. The men seem far more socially awkward and stereotypically nerdy than the women. It is nice to chat with other students and learn a little something about fields outside of my own. In theology and religious studies here there are mainly Koreans studying Biblical studies and Malaysians doing Islam studies. 90% seem to have families and keep to themselves. Honestly, I don’t mind not talking with the Biblical studies students. I really don’t understand how there can possibly be anything new to say about the Book of Mark or 2 Corinthians, etc. Unless one approaches the books with a modern, cutting edge ideology, I just don’t care. I try to avoid the bible as much as I possibly can.

In general I feel clueless about my own work. I cannot speak intelligently about my topic, ideas or methodology. I was asked at one of these coffee mornings what my methodology was and I replied, “read a lot, do some thinking, write some stuff down, read some more.” That elicited a blank look. Not quite what the guy had in mind.

Adam is meeting some of the Islamic mothers and kids at the Family Centre, which I think is neat. Next week we are going to a birthday party at Nigerian Muslim family’s house. The mum is really bright and cheery, and beautiful. We discovered first hand the racial difference in visa applications: Her husband is a student and they have to apply every year. She was shocked that I was given a three-year visa. I felt bad for a second or two – ashamed a little for myself and how my whiteness benefits me, frustrated for her and her family, who are upstanding and hard working and have to deal with the Home Office every single year, and angry that we live in a racist world. And then I got over it. It is beyond my control.

So reading. I am currently reading Sergius Bulgakov’s ‘The Burning Bush: on the Orthodox Veneration of the Mother of God.’ I was just loaned ‘Introducing Thealogy: Discourse on the Goddess’ so I’ll dive into that next. At home I’m reading a poetry volume, Victor Anderson’s ‘Thorns of the Blood Rose.’

Dinner tonight is lasagne and wine. I’m also making refried beans for Sunday brunch: we’re having friends up for heuvos rancheros. YUM.

Spring is here. I feel it in my blood. I feel it in the warmth of the sun, despite the cold air. I feel it in the lengthening days. I hear it in the bird song. I see it in the daffodil shoots. It's wonderful.

I'm embracing the irrational more and more. I'm finding the best things in life, the things that I'm most passionate about, the things that put me in touch with the sublime, are not rational things.
Except for maybe really good wine and food and conversation, but even then there's something more in that, because even good food and wine can be less than sublime. The best things in life are greater than the sum of their parts.

And speaking of irrational and spring, I continue to want another child. Could this month be the month?

It's only Sunday afternoon but it's been a great weekend. I took Friday off studying and spent it with B and Adam. I can't really remember what we did, but I know the pacing was perfect. We received a new sweater each from MM, which made me feel glamorous. Adam bought some wine in a spirit of generosity.

But the best part has got to be making friends with the neighborhood boys. A group of boys play football/soccer in the little yard between our house and the cemetery. Their goal is the wall of our house. Bennett loves to hear them play so Friday afternoon I took him out to watch. The boys, about 5 of them, aged 10, asked B to play. B was in heaven. He just chased after the boys, laughing, falling down and getting filthy muddy. For the last two days the boys have knocked on our door and asked if Bennett wanted to come out and play with them. The boys are really nice kids.

And to think that we were warned that this neighborhood was 'rough.'

I think spring is on its way. There have been three spider sightings in our house. Two have been whisper thin daddy-long-legs type of spiders. But this morning there was a nice black spider on the front door. In spite of the cold temperatures I think spring is making an effort. I certainly notice the lengthening days. I feel the surge of energy from the sun, the spring in my step, it's easier to get up in the mornings - all welcome signs of spring for me.

I made my own refried beans! They aren't excellent yet, but they're good. And my recipe made TONS all for the low low price of a fiver. Massive win. Will post the recipe later, if any one is interested.

This afternoon I'm going to Bristol to hear Ronald Hutton, author of the book on modern paganism. I'm looking forward to getting out of the region, seeing something new, and hearing this man speak. Will report back tomorrow!

I was going to take the day off the internet but I've only been out of bed for not quite two hours and I already feel defeated. It was a hard night. Very very cold (remember our house has no insulation). B nursed all night long, and squirmed. The water main in the neighborhood froze yesterday so we have to ration the water. Maybe I can take a shower? I only shower every other day, less when it's dry and cold like this, so this morning I really need a shower. If I attempt I know it won't be a warm shower. Ugh. The dishes are piled high in the kitchen. And of course, because of the snow and ice the washing machine repairman hasn't been able to make it out so we have piles of laundry too. Adam received a pay check this morning, which would be great and a huge relief, except he forgot to tell the clients to make the check out to him and not his business. So frustrating. I'm feeling the tickle of a sore throat. And..... Bennett is hitting full on toddler mode. He's discovered 'No' and whinging. Ay yi yi.

In good news (because I really need to perk myself up), B also said Mama last night for the first time. I just about melted. It's also stunningly beautiful here. We have plenty of heat. I made delicious veggie lasagne last night. Tomorrow we are having some new friends over for Adam's amazing cheeseburgers.

No. That didn't help. Still feeling exhausted. It just might be one of those days.

But this picture is incredibly beautiful.

Today I'm feeling slow, a little crusty and achey (I ran into the bathroom door), but mostly I'm feeling happy. It's a good time write a gratitude post.

I am grateful for:
*Snow? Frost? It doesn't matter. This morning the outside was crispy and white!
*A good night's sleep
*Our new clothes dryer. OMG, clothes and diapers that are soft and not crispy! And dry in less than two days!
*Playdates for Bennett. Really nice family people and their little kids that love Bennett
*Winter! Christmas! Solstice!
*A truly amazing and happy little boy
*Living in Wales, a healthy, green, magical place - this makes me happy every day I wake up here
*The Family Centre - basically it's a parent particpation preschool. That's my best description. It's been a sanity-saver for us and Bennett loves it there. Plus, it's great to feel like we're a part of the community