Will this still be necessary?

[theatokos]

I am letting go. My dreams tell me I have to. The relief and ease I feel after I pry open even one finger from the fist around my heart is almost worth the what ifs and the black holes in my spirit. If I keep breathing perhaps I won't implode under the weight of guilt, fear, or grief. If I keep breathing maybe I will be too busy working on the basics of living that I won't confuse myself with more complicated manoevers.

On a happier note, going to GJ's for an introduction to Bollywood. Greg is professor here and there's a small group of us that seem to have created a movie group. It's neat. He's making Indian food; I'm making my favorite garlicy salad in my favorite wooden salad bowl. I am also pleased to say I did a goodly chunk of reading today (mingled with plenty of staring into space for good measure). I will now learn some notes for tomorrow and take a shower. Maybe even read some more, if I feel ambitious.