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Date: 2009-05-11 11:44 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2009-05-12 12:07 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2009-05-12 12:16 am (UTC)http://www.handinhandparenting.org/csArticles/articles/000000/000029.htm
R's been studying/practicing the counseling philosophy behind this for a couple decades actually (as have I for the past ~8-9 years since we've been married), so we adapted our own path based on that thinking & our experience that it seems to work (ie, getting emotions out of your system *with supportive attention from an engaged listener*, rather than suppressing them & letting them build up).
Just putting it out there...
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Date: 2009-05-12 01:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-12 02:22 am (UTC)We didn't do sleep training of any kind, but we did stop offering food as the first method of comfort at night, trying pretty much everything first and using food as a backup plan (although even back then most of the time it only took one round of cuddle/pat to get him back to sleep). A bit harder for you to do with B since he knows the food comes from your person ;).
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Date: 2009-05-12 03:04 am (UTC)My advice. just roll with it. Do what you are comfortable doing. There is no "right" way. No one solution is the one that "always" works or lasts forever. Just when you think you've got it solved things change.
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Date: 2009-05-12 03:22 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2009-05-12 04:43 am (UTC)I think being in the parents room just adds to the problem for both baby and parents.
And a tip for later which seems to contradict what I am saying. Sometime after age three they wake in the middle of the night and want to get in your bed. The doctors then insisted you take them back to their room. Again and again. That way led to no sleep for everyone. Our solution was to have a quilt and pillow on the floor on my side of the bed (which was also near the heat). Son would just wander in and settle down to sleep beside the bed. After awhile I didn't even wake up. Eventually he didn't need to do that any more.
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Date: 2009-05-12 09:14 am (UTC)Now, he only wakes up during the night if he is sick, poor baby.
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Date: 2009-05-12 09:15 am (UTC)Babies are small animals - they cry if they're hungry, in pain, uncomfortable or bored. So you feed 'em, change them & play with them. By & large a baby makes her/his own routine & forcing anything is unwise.
Babies in with parents is a matter of choice. As
I was lucky - happy babies & no horror stories. There is IMHV, far too much interference from self-important 'experts' nowadays, & an obsession with weight gain & milestones etc. So long as they can tie their own shoelaces & go to the loo unaided by the time they go to school, they'll be fine.
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Date: 2009-05-12 01:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-12 02:01 pm (UTC)Our sleep training consisted of removing the soother from the nightime routine, adding a 'lovey' (stuffed animal in our case), and eliminating the middle-of-the-night feeding. The first night we just didn't give him his soother, and when he woke up we didn't give him a bottle (just went in and patted/shushed him until he went back to sleep). I was amazed at how quickly he went back to sleep, and it's been like that ever since.
He sleeps from 7:00 p.m. to anytime between 6:00-7:00 a.m. now (although we don't get him up until 6:45....if he wakes up before 6:45, he babbles to himself and plays with a crib toy that makes music, has buttons for him to push etc).
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Date: 2009-05-12 05:19 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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