Mama brain trust

[theatokos]

Ok. Discipline for a bright not-quite-18month old. Lay it on me. It seems too early for time outs. The only thing we need to discipline for is hitting. He is my child so this is not surprising at all. If my mother knew she'd be overjoyed. He loves to throw things and waves sticks around and hit. It definitely seems more out of energy and love of the action than out of malice. He's just as quick to hug and kiss and he doesn't hit other children, just me and Adam. But now some times we get whacked with whatever it is he's carrying around. We give him lots of attention, play time and room to be loud and active.

Any suggestions? Right now we say No firmly, say he may not hit, and if he keeps doing it we hold his hands or arms. He doesn't see us hit nor do we have tv, so it's not by example. I'm sure tired of being hit.

Comments

[raving-liberal.livejournal.com]

We did time outs at that age, but they were accompanied (I'd sit on the chair with them), very brief, and the goal just a separation from the activity where the trouble was being caused. We also sometimes did toy/item time outs -- "Oh no! You were hitting with the stick! This stick needs a time out."

[honeyrider.livejournal.com]

we did time outs at 18 months. generally 1-1.5 minutes. i'd say something like - "eloise, biting (that was our issue) is bad behavior. we don't bite people. you are going to time out." after the time out i'd reminder why she was there, ask her not to do that anymore, and tell her i love her. worked pretty well.

[jesamin.livejournal.com]

If Addie hits, I take her hand and say no hitting, hitting hurts. Then I show her how to do nice touches on herself and on whoever was the recipient of the hitting. It seems to work? She went through a hitting stage about a month or two back that definitely sucked.

[msmidge.livejournal.com]

I don't know what you should do. But if it is any consolation (or makes you laugh), the other night Sam told me I was an asshole, and then he said it again to make sure I got the message. This morning he was in a bad mood and said, "I don't love you, Mom." He retracted it later, though I don't think he ever retracted the "asshole" comment. :P

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

Ha! Yeah, I'm not looking forward to the talking back. Most times when we are telling Bennett not to do something, he looks at us and uses the same tone of voice and hand motions to "talk" to us. I see 'talking back' in our future!

[(Anonymous)]

I was talking to the mom of my 10yrs friend who got the ever so lovely, "I don't love you!" and she said a friend of her's told her a good retort for that was "We'll I've got enough love for the both of us."

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

That is a brilliant reply. I shall have to remember that.

[miss-malloreee.livejournal.com]

We use time outs & for the most part they work.

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

Does she sit by herself or do you have to sit with her?

[miss-malloreee.livejournal.com]

She goes into her crib & left alone for a few minutes. I've found that placing her in a corner or sitting with me almost always leads to a full blown tantrum. Removing Anna from all stimulation is what works best. I find she typically starts hitting, biting & touching things she knows are no, when she is overstimulated & needs to wind down. When we are at home I can ask her if she needs a time out & she will tell me she does. I've yet to figure out any sort of dicipline that works when we are out of the house.

We also do light smacks on her hand & those get the point across as well.

Can't believe I'm saying anything about this

[hrafntinna.livejournal.com]

Some parents I know are careful that the one who puts the kid in Time Out is the one to bring him or her back out of it. Makes sense to me.

Re: Can't believe I'm saying anything about this

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

Absolutely makes sense to me! Right now, B won't stay in a time out location, so we say it's time for a time out, sit him on our lap and hold his hands, telling him he may not hit people.

Re: Can't believe I'm saying anything about this

[(Anonymous)]

Sounds like your doing everything right. Just stick to it, and make sure you do it every single time, with as little attention given to B,(during the punishment-time out)as possible.