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Things what are on my mind lately:

Bennett. We are definitely entering into uncharted territory here. Teething? Just hitting the 'terrible twos*'? After two good nights of sleep he was up from 3-5am, generally unhappy. He's cried a TON this morning already and if he sees me all he wants to do is nurse. He's really into repetition. We read the same 6 books over and over and he points out the same things over and over. But his attention span is wavering. He'll pick out a book and then halfway through go and grab another. It is intense these days.

Theology. Always theology. I had a whole post in mind last night, but I've lost it. Finding uninterrupted writing time at home while an idea is fresh in my head is nearly impossible. Thankfully B is sucked into a basketball game with Adam right now.

Food. We have been so poor lately that I've gotten very good at stretching meals and cooking healthy on the ultra-cheap. It's been great! Loads of veggies and grains. One chicken can last for 5 meals! But wow, have we been craving cheese and meat. I just ate a grilled cheese, bacon and spinach sandwich, with mayonnaise. Hell to the yeah. But it's not just fat I'm craving. I'm also craving tea and wine. I've given up tea, coffee and wine in my house for 'Lent'. Not when I'm at other people's places because tea is such a part of the social fabric here. And it's not just alcohol I miss, I miss California wine. In fact, I was laying in bed in the wee hours of the morning thinking about specific wines from specific vineyards that I miss.

Tomorrow though I'll get my food and wine fix. We are going to our friends' house (the people who own Town Hall Cafe). He is making ribs. I'm making my own refried beans and 7 layer dip. Hopefully they'll bring some of the stuffed peppers they sell in their deli - they are AMAZING and go beautifully with wine. We're going to watch the Super Bowl. Yes, a day late. Adam is hoping to download the game - with commercials! He (not Adam) is very into sports and She has no idea what the Super Bowl is all about. Should be really fun.

My body. I am missing exercise something fierce. I keep thinking about how fit I was before I had Bennett. Even while I was pregnant. I biked three miles to work every day (so I guess that's 6 miles total) up until I was 4 months pregnant. I was doing intense yoga up until the week B was born. I don't expect to get back to that level of fitness for the next pregnancy. I'd love to lose the stomach flab, but I'm pretty resigned to it. Short of giving up cheese and working out every day, neither thing interests me in the least, I don't think it's going to budge. I am back into my old jeans, but my body is different. Up until I had a baby I looked much younger than I am. Last week another mother assumed I was 24 or so. But the tired eyes, the growing grey streak, the stomach flab.... yeah, I'm not 24 anymore. And this stomach flab is what built Bennett. The flab isn't my favorite thing and I hate how it folds over my pants, but for the most part it's a badge of pride.


*Which I think is a misnomer. It's really not terrible so much as baffling. I feel worse for B most times than I do for myself! And he's not two, but then I've heard from some people that the months leading up to 2 are worse than 2 itself. We'll see.
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theatokos

October 2010

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