Rape is never the victims fault

[theatokos]

Women say some rape victims should take the blame

WHAT? I don't even need to read this entire article to know that women have internalized the hateful misogony of the patriarchy and suffer from self-loathing ideology. Why do women hate each other like this? Rape is NEVER the victim's fault. Even if you're comatose from drinking or you're walking naked down the street. Women make loads of stupid decisions all the time. And there are other consequences of the above actions: alcohol poisoning and the flu, perhaps. But rape? It is not a man's duty to 'punish' me for my stupid actions. Women and men may judge women who make stupid choices and think 'they got what they deserved', but that's not what it is about is it? No. It's about men thinking women are sex objects, that any woman who is passive enough is theirs for taking, that women are sub-human and do not have the dignity that men have. In cases of rape the blame is ALWAYS on the assailant. It is the perpetrator who cannot keep his hands (and other bits) to himself. It is HIS lack of self-control and his lack of honor for other living creatures.

I was date raped when I was 20. I take responsibility for my stupidness. I acknowledge that I was weak and had poor boundaries. I did not report it because it was so.... murky. I was up for fooling around. I was not up for sex. I said no. He didn't listen. We were in my bed. Am I to blame? If you say yes, defriend me right now.

Comments

i was nodding to most of the comments until i read this.

[honeyrider.livejournal.com]

ah. what? am i misreading?

i didn't realize that by being part of an oppressed class automatically makes my experiences bear more worth than a man's.

that's fucking brutal.

Re: i was nodding to most of the comments until i read this.

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

It is. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about the comment. On a personal level I disagree, because each individual's experience is the totality of truth for that person. In a place of human compassion I disagree with the statement. However, on an institutional level, I agree. In the legal world a man's testimony still seems to have more weight than a woman's, particularly in cases of rape. In medicine, the male body is still the norm. So in some cases, two people are assaulted outside a bar - a male and a female - and their experiences are going to be very different. The man, I assume, would not fear for his bodily integrity, nor would the legal case ask what he was wearing.