(no subject)

[theatokos]

It's close to 1 AM. Bennett has finally - FINALLY - consented to sleeping. He had two half hour naps, passed out at 7.30, slept for two hours. I came to bed at 9.30 and my mere presence woke him up. It's like he's got special mama radar that functions eve in the heaviest of his sleeping. He would not go back to sleep.

Our night:
Nursing, snuggling, singing, bottle, repeat the first three. Headbutts, squirming, babbling, kicking. Swaddling, nursing, singing, stroking, bottle. Crying, flailing, hands and knees, chasing fairies (or something that he can see and I can't) up the wall, kicking Adam repeatedly in the upper extremities. Bottle, cuddling, stroking. Kicking, crying, laughing. Adam leaves for the couch. Sleeping! Crying, all fours, crawling, whacking head into wall. Light on, diaper change, nursing, cuddling. Screaming, sobbing, squirming, passing out. Sneaking out to pee..... AWAKE! Crying, snuggling, nursing. ASLEEP!

Peeing, water, snack, internet, bed.

OY.

Good thing I'll be fresh and rested for the portraits that we're getting taken tomorrow.

Comments

[ewigweibliche.livejournal.com]

I disagree. Kids WILL move into their own beds when they are ready and they will wean themselves. Stories of 6 year olds still breastfeeding are not the norm. I hope to breastfeed for another year. But if he weans (and some days it feels like he might) then so be it. I know many mothers of children who weaned and moved out of the family bed on their own with out any fuss. To wean and move Bennett now would be traumatic for us all. Some nights are hard, but most nights are sweet and peaceful. Perhaps I need to post about those?

I do recognize that I am in charge and I parent as though I am, but imposing my will on the instinctual needs of my baby does not interest me. There are going to be plenty of instances when this will be necessary, but I don't think it is yet. Wanting to be near me, having excessive energy, wanting comfort and to nurse are not inappropriate or "wrong" in any way, just inconveniencing. I'm ok with being inconvenienced by my son. Honestly, having a kid is inconveniencing and taxing period, but that's what I signed up for!